Stress Management: Helping your children (and yourself) navigate the pressures of daily life

In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, stress can become a familiar companion for both adults and children alike. From academic pressures to social challenges, children often encounter various stressors that can impact their well-being. As parents, it is important to recognize the signs of the different types of stress in our children, and equip them with the tools to manage it effectively.

Understanding stress

The word “stress” often gets a bad reputation; however, the definition of stress really is just pressure. Pressure can come in many forms and on some levels, it improves performance. Pressure to play well and win the game will make a better athlete and lead to more practice. Pressure to get a good grade often leads to the completion of an assignment or studying more for a test. Pressure to be a good friend leads to spending time together or calling to check in. Pressure to pick up after oneself or clean a room leads to being a better roommate and hygienic adult. All of these pressures are a natural part of life and something every person experiences at different times and different degrees. As with anything too much pressure at once, what we often mean when we say we are “stressed”, can lead to negative consequences for both our mental and physical health. This is when worry and anxiety take over.

Signs of stress in children

Recognizing the subtle signs of stress in children is crucial. These signs may include tiredness, sleeping difficulties, changes in appetite, stomachaches, headaches, or even school refusal. It may also include atypical behaviors such as crying out of the blue and increased irritability. Parents should monitor any unusual behaviors. If these signs persist for more than two weeks and does not resolve or have a clear reason and timeline of improvement, it’s important to seek support from school counselors, therapists or health care professionals. When a clear pressure is present, such as finals or a sports tournament, parents can help their child look at the stress differently and manage it effectively.

Proactive stress management

Stress management should not be reactive but rather proactive, starting before overwhelming situations arise. Here are some strategies that can help children manage stress effectively:

1. Prioritize brain fuel: Ensure that your child gets adequate sleep, stays hydrated, and consumes nutritious food. These factors are essential for maintaining optimal brain function. When even one of these areas is low, the brain is not going to have enough energy to function at its best capacity and manage the pressures. Just like a hungry or sleep-deprived toddler can become dysregulated, lack of sleep or proper nutrition can impair a child’s ability to cope with stress.
2. Encourage outlets: Encourage your child to engage in activities that bring them joy and relaxation. Outlets can be divided into four main categories: Activities that are fun and distracting, soothing and relaxing, ones that require physical exertion, and interactions with people you can talk to or talk with about something to distract you. By prioritizing at least one of these outlets for at least 10 minutes daily or every other day, children can alleviate stress and maintain a sense of balance in their lives.
3. Model healthy stress management: Children often mimic the behaviors they observe in adults. If parents and adults in their life always appear overwhelmed and stressed, children think this is normal and will also appear overwhelmed and stressed. Plus, stress is contagious. It is really hard to remain calm and content when everyone around you is tense and worried. As parents, it’s essential to model healthy stress management techniques. Demonstrate how to cope with pressure calmly and positively, whether it’s through exercise, mindfulness practices, or seeking support from loved ones.
4. Foster open communication: Create a supportive environment where your child feels comfortable expressing their feelings and concerns. Encourage open communication and actively listen to their worries without judgment. By fostering a safe space for dialogue, you can help alleviate your child’s stress and provide guidance when needed.
    

Stress is an inevitable part of life, but with the right tools and support, children can learn to manage it effectively. By recognizing the signs of stress, promoting healthy habits, and modeling positive coping strategies, parents can empower their kids to navigate life’s challenges with resilience and confidence.

To learn more about Mental and Behavioral Services at Children’s Hospital New Orleans, visit: Mental and Behavioral Health Services | Children's Hospital New Orleans (chnola.org)